Cockpunched!

Last night I was at my friend Corbet’s house and he punched me in the cock.  I was going to borrow the first ten seasons of South Park, all of which were in my hand, when he suddenly rocked my world.  I instantly dropped to my knees and the dvds flew to the ground.  It hurt pretty bad.  To make up for it, Corbet gave me the entire series of Beast Wars on dvd!  I was puh-retty excited about that, I even forgot all about the pain in my cock.  I think tomorrow me and corbet are going to watch the entire series, and rub cocoa butter on each others nipples, followed by some beanut butter and jelly sandwich sex.  I don’t know, but I think we are going to be together forever.  I’ve never quite felt this way about anyone before.  His body is a wonderland, from the taste of his candy lips, to his bubble gum tongue.  The way the summer breeze blows through his honey blonde locks, his soft laughter, and his beautiful smile give me a reason to live.  Needless to say, Randy Marsh is my favorite South Park Character. 

Penetrate the Cervix

You ever wonder if while having sex that you might puncture the cervix? I’ve heard it’s possible. No really, I have. If you think I’m joking then you’re an asshole.  And it’s not just me, it’s him too.
So anyways, I’ve now firmly incorporated myself into the world of blogging, and boy! are all of you in for a real treat!  Over the years I’ve seen and imagined many interesting and useless things, and it won’t all just be dreadlocks and gorillas, oh no sir.  I have a repertoire of adventures in stock for all of you that will leave you breathless, astounded, bewildered, pantsless, slapping children, incapable of voluntary bowel movements, running for office, and getting naked and starting the revolution!!!  However… I’m really getting ahead of myself in terms of what is really the issue here, pornography.  Let’s us gather in celebration of a true milestone in human history when porn is more available than ever!!!  I can be online and finished cleaning up in less than 10 minutes now with live streaming!

I Love The Internet!